So you want to know how long to wait before you contact your ex? The short answer is to that is “Not now”, but I understand you want to get your ex back quickly and so I’ll explain to you how you should plan to win him or her back.

If you are reading this, [...]]]> So you want to know how long to wait before you contact your ex? The short answer is to that is “Not now”, but I understand you want to get your ex back quickly and so I’ll explain to you how you should plan to win him or her back.

If you are reading this, chances are you’ve broken up with your ex not so long ago. With that said, why in the world would your ex want to speak to you after he or she has dumped you? I say “dumped you”, because you reading this tells me it is unlikely that you’ve done the dumping.

Your ex has dumped you, and you see in terms of getting back together, your ex has the upper hand here. You hold no cards as opposed to your ex… well, this individual has many options. Your ex would have called you by now if he or she felt that leaving you was a mistake.

How do you feel when you get a call from someone you wish to avoid? Irritated? Angered? I mean, we get nothing positive here do we? So stop calling, don’t call your ex, and I want you to just wait out until the right time. I stress the reasons for not calling your ex because I know it is extremely hard to cut off contact with your ex at this point.

Give your ex at least two weeks of time completely free from your influence. 2 weeks is just the minimum amount of time you should wait, you should know your situation better and at times you may have to wait many more weeks for the right timing.

During this period of your absence, if your ex was angry at you the anger will subside, if your ex didn’t want to see you then your ex will start to miss you a little, and the negative thoughts your ex kept bringing up would have been replaced by fonder memories of the two of you.

If you’ve been together with your ex for some time, then it’s likely that the two of you have mutual friends. One way or another you will hear about your ex and your ex will get the news about you as well. You will get a better read of timing with these indirect exchanges of interests and you should use it to your advantage.

The basic rule of thumb is to give your ex as much time as your patience allows, do your best to wait out for as long as you can. You should also use mutual friends to your advantage because they will give you information about your ex otherwise you had no chance of acquiring. Sometimes you can be frank with these mutual friends and seek out help to get your ex back, but generally they will not feel comfortable keeping secret from your ex. All you have to do is to listen to your friends and they will give you all the information you need without you having to pry them out.

If you play your cards right, make a solid plan, and follow it through, then you’d stand a real good chance at getting your ex back. The hardest part of getting an ex back is keeping your emotions in check and it’s also what messes up so many people’s chance to get back together with their ex girlfriend/boyfriend. If you could examine your situation rationally, you would understand that to regain the control of your life (or at least the confidence that you have control of), controlling your emotion is perhaps the most important part of the equation. It is only when you have regained this control, that you would understand why you must give your ex the space and time away from you.

In your current state of mind, it would be far too easy for you to jump in way too prematurely. On the other hand, it will be nearly impossible for you to wait out too long before you contact your ex, again, because of your current state of mind. So be mindful of contacting your ex, do your best to wait out for as long as you can, and you’ll be one step closer to getting your ex back.

For some people the timing may never feel right and you may be one of them, afraid to make a move or too impatient to wait out. Life rarely offers second chances and when you have it, the last thing you want is to mess it up. If getting your ex back is important to you, then perhaps you should check out some professional “Ex Back” systems that have helped 1000s of people get back with their ex lovers. To check them out, visit “The Magic of Making Up”, “Ex Girlfriend Guru”, and “Ex Boyfriend Guru”.

©2010 Win Back Lost Love. All Rights Reserved.

7 Steps on How to Save a Relationship

John works long hours and Pam doesn’t feel he is there for her. Pam spends all of her time meeting the children’s needs and John feels that she doesn’t have time for his needs? Can this relationship be saved? Should it be saved? Here’s [...]]]> 7 Steps on How to Save a Relationship

John works long hours and Pam doesn’t feel he is there for her. Pam spends all of her time meeting the children’s needs and John feels that she doesn’t have time for his needs? Can this relationship be saved? Should it be saved? Here’s how to save a relationship.

First, you must decide whether the relationship is worth saving. While almost every relationship can be saved with hard work, both parties must decide that they want to make it work. Because if a partner has opted out and doesn’t want to opt back in, there is little that can be done.

Many people stay in a relationship because it is convenient or remain in a marriage because of the children. But that is not enough. How to save a relationship starts with a commitment by both parties that the relationship is worth saving.

Next, you must pinpoint the problem or problems in a relationship. One of the biggest problems in how to save a relationship is that people believe the symptoms of the problem are the problem itself.

For instance, many people think an affair is a problem that causes break ups. In truth, the affair is a symptom of a deeper problem. For instance, a lack of true intimacy can lead to a straying spouse. While most people look at the affair as the problem, the underlying cause of the affair was the lack of intimacy in the primary relationship. If you do not deal with the lack of intimacy, you might be able to keep another affair from starting through the use of guilt, but another problem (for instance pornography) could pop up because you haven’t dealt with the core issue.

When you start to deal with core issues rather than symptoms, you can save the relationship.

Once you have identified the core problems, you can begin to share your thoughts. This means both verbalizing your own feelings and listening to your partner’s concerns. Hold your partner’s hand when you are talking about your problems as a signal that you want to reconnect even when your emotions are swirling. When your partner talks about things that hurt you remember that he or she is not doing it because he or she wants to hurt you. Rather it is because they want to improve the relationship.

Once you have detailed the problems in your relationship, create an action plan to solve them. Then, take concrete steps on your action plan. If you don’t spend time together like you used to, plan a date night every week. Take turns coming up with creative ways to spend an evening together each Wednesday. If not communicating is the problem, commit to spending 20 minutes before going to bed just talking to one another. And, then do it.

Finally, you should realize that saving a relationship is an ongoing process. You are going to take two steps forward only to take one step back. There is going to be both laughter and tears going forward. Be quick to apologize and slow to blame.

Is your relationship worth saving? If so, It’s described in this article how to save a relationship.

For professional “Ex Back” systems, refer to “The Magic of Making Up”, “Ex Boyfriend Guru”, and “Ex Girlfriend Guru”.

©2010 Win Back Lost Love. All Rights Reserved.